"I was cleaning out the water tank for the sweat and lifted it onto its side to empty it. When I turned back again there was a mouse inside the empty tank trying to get out. I felt we had spent a lot of time in opening up and somehow the mouse being there seemed significant.
Sure enough during our contact journey to find which spirit would speak I met mouse and they assured me they would come. Again finding a dead mouse which had drowned in a bowl of water left in the sweat the next day seemed significant, though sad if we killed it with our carelessness, which speaks of a bigger theme I think.
At the beginning of the ritual I was human and listened to the beings that spoke. Their words whether tentative or full of rage or sadness were listened to with honour. I felt deep sorrow at pandas plea for privacy and more sorrow that they didn't know a way for us to help change their plight. I felt that for eagle to still offer us communication after all that has happened was amazing.
That these spirits wanted to to speak and be heard to develop a relationship with humans again was a honour. Composts' [Soil's] presence was strong even with the difficulties of being in a body and whale seemed to speak across a great distance. Fox and the horned gods had practical advice that I am planning to take.
When it felt right I put on my mask and called to the red women, my spirit sisters, and they came striding through the woods with thousands of mice clinging to them like they were wearing great furry cloaks. The mice left them and came swarming towards me a tidal wave of furry bodies...and ran up my body and stuffed themselves under my mask. Good thing I'm not claustrophobic! Each time I spoke it was like I'd heard a hundred tiny voices in my head.
They had come because we had called them, not because they particularly care about our existence. More that they are concerned that what we do affects them. They like rubbish. They live in great numbers around us but still they cannot devour all our rubbish, especially as it's not all food.
They feel we waste things. Not only material things, but we waste our own skills and do not always maximize our talents to act with integrity in this world. I think for me part of that is that I am pulled from the majical real world to the world where television and fame are god constantly. It's hard to hang on to the truth and I realise I am constantly looking for ways to keep myself in the world I want to be in.
The mouse's' warning was that rubbish was our nemesis. It feels true. It's also true that they would survive without us but that we have the power to fuck it up for every living thing on the planet - with the possible exception of cockroaches of course!
It's a huge challenge to work out what all this information is for in some ways, but I think we are at the beginning of something that needs a lot more exploring and also that a lot more people would benefit from experiencing.Time will allow us all to develop our own journeys and discover threads which we can weave together.
When all the mice left I felt quite hot but did manage to be a listening human again. I was glad that I had had both experiences in the circle - both speaker and listener. Afterwards I felt quiet and sort of full up."